Have you ever found yourself in the awkward position of addressing a co-worker as you might address one of your children, or talking to your boss the way you might talk to your spouse, or even chatting with your mother or father as if they were your best buddy?
We all mix up the many roles we play at some time in our lives, particularly in today’s society where we are all expected to multi-task at lightening speed.
Example: You rush to get up in the morning (responsible adult), get your children up (parent), get them dressed (wardrobe consultant), tell them the expected temperature (weather forecaster), feed them (chef) and get them to school (chauffeur). Then you drive to pick up your friend (friend) so that you can carpool to work (employee, business owner). In the first two hours of the day, you have played a number of different roles in quick succession.
When you arrive at your place of business, it is important to take off all those hats you have already worn that morning except for the ones that are necessary for you to successfully conduct your work.
Then there are the occasions when you realize that you are a slightly different person with each of your friends, co-workers, associates and family members. Who should you “be” if suddenly you find yourself together with all these people, say at a wedding, birthday party, anniversary, etc?
Example: Your somewhat serious friend with whom you like to discuss politics, spirituality and other weighty issues might be surprised to meet your wild and crazy friend with whom you like to let loose and party! Your wild and crazy friend might be surprised to meet your troubled friend who looks to you for support and healing in their depressed state.
We all have the ability to be different things to different people at different times. Where it becomes confusing is when energy is placed in those roles we play, or those parts of ourselves, by people other than ourselves. Or when we forget to switch hats at the appropriate time. Or when we are given roles by others that do not ring true and do not feel right.
Example: You meet a wonderful guy or girl, you fall in love and marry or commit to each other. As the relationship evolves and grows, you find that there are expectations being put in your space about being a wife, husband, girlfriend or boyfriend that do not feel right. Is it really an insult to your partner if you want to spend a little time with some friends without him or her? Does that mean you are not being a good mate?
Then of course there are the roles that we outgrow.
Example: Your mother or father still treats you as if you are a child, even though you are an adult with your own family, career, responsibilities, etc.? Although you will always be your parents’ child, as an adult you have outgrown the need to be treated as a child or “raised” in the same way as when you were younger. You do not need to be reminded of your siblings birthdays and anniversaries, or be told to write thank you letters.
In this era of getting back to basics, simplifying as much as possible and reconnecting with our core essence, perhaps one of the steps we can take is to examine all the roles we play, let go of those that are no longer pertinent to our lives and heal, or clear out other people’s energy from those we wish to continue with.
Example: Imagine each of the roles that you play comes with a hat. Take a look at each of your hats and see if they are the way you would like them to be. This can be very simply done by finding a quiet place to sit, closing your eyes and imagining the hats out in front of you.
It may help to write down all of the roles you play before you begin to look at those hats.
For instance there are the roles of son, daughter, mother, father, grandparent, aunt, uncle, friend, associate, partner, business owner, co-worker, employee, healer, sister, brother, homemaker, teacher, entrepreneur, artist, etc. There are way too many to list all of the possibilities here!
However, each one of them represents a different energy vibration. So this is where you get to be creative by designing each of those hats the way you would like them to look – color, shape, material, accessories, etc. This is a very simple way of owning those roles or hats for yourself and setting them at a vibration of energy that is in affinity with you and your personal, individual path.
If you find there are some hats appearing that clearly don’t belong to you, simply throw them away or give them back to the rightful owners!
If you would like assistance with this process of sorting your hats, consider taking a Creative Meditation class at Intuitive Way. There you will learn practical energy tools that help put you back in the driver’s seat of your life and assist you with sorting out your energy from that belonging to others.
When you recognize and heal those roles you play in your life, you will be better able to enjoy and succeed in all of them!
Photos courtesy of stock.xchng